Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize
