and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
His nipple licking is glorious
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