The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
I have already put on my inside pants.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
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