Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Randomize
