not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
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