KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Randomize
