His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
Randomize
