ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
