4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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