But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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