i'm signing you up for texting rehab
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
