Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
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