You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
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If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
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It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
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