remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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