I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
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