i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
How does one acquire holy water?
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Randomize