GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
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Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
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