Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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