party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
