I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize