Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
Randomize
