so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
i drank out of a bidet.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I need moral support for this bender
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Randomize