so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
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