new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
I skipped work to stalk him.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
Randomize
