so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
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