perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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