your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
25 People Confess The Most Ignorant Thing Someone Has Ever Said To Them
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.