Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Randomize
