can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
PS: I just woke up from my shower
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
Randomize
