only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Randomize
