walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
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She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize