More tranny stories later!
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
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