Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
25 People Didn’t Realize They Were Talking To Someone Famous
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.