Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(818): View more from California

Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?

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(818): Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess? http://tfl.nu/uim6

Replies (5) Good night (1030) Bad night (520)
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(360): View more from Washington

I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.

(646): View more from New York

I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.

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(360): I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am. (646): I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ. http://tfl.nu/g49z

Replies (13) Good night (625) Bad night (1182)
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(586): View more from Michigan

Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?

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(586): Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right? http://tfl.nu/c996

Replies (20) Good night (2405) Bad night (1217)
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(248): View more from Michigan

he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was

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(248): he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was http://tfl.nu/zwm2

Replies (51) Good night (1161) Bad night (9009)
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(530): View more from California

I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.

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(530): I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight. http://tfl.nu/7iib

Replies (54) Good night (4659) Bad night (812)
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(512): View more from Texas

this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on

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(512): this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on http://tfl.nu/vnoj

Replies (22) Good night (3694) Bad night (1422)
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(419): View more from Ohio

We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.

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(419): We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic. http://tfl.nu/lf87

Replies (11) Good night (2403) Bad night (1761)
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(609): View more from New Jersey

He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.

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(609): He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place. http://tfl.nu/k1hb

Replies (30) Good night (1416) Bad night (2036)
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(609): View more from New Jersey

I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.

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(609): I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt. http://tfl.nu/9dqv

Replies (10) Good night (746) Bad night (2270)
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(978): View more from Massachusetts

I guess, just don't make it awkward

(603): View more from New Hampshire

MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY

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(978): I guess, just don't make it awkward (603): MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY http://tfl.nu/y6gk

Replies (10) Good night (759) Bad night (1512)
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(202): View more from Washington, DC

To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.

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(202): To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned. http://tfl.nu/z20l

Replies (20) Good night (770) Bad night (2352)
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(514): View more from Quebec

He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.

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(514): He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac. http://tfl.nu/t8wx

Replies (11) Good night (500) Bad night (1509)
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(815): View more from Illinois

i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.

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(815): i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar. http://tfl.nu/c912

Replies (5) Good night (523) Bad night (356)
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(612): View more from Minnesota

did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?

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(612): did you just take a shot to penises and friendship? http://tfl.nu/wdge

Replies (2) Good night (660) Bad night (247)
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(613): View more from Ontario

Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?

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(613): Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch? http://tfl.nu/k968

Replies (1) Good night (633) Bad night (294)

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