Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
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