sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
