So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
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