My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
Just pee around me
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
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