Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Randomize
