There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
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