dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
21 Awkward Ways People Found Out Their Partner Was Into Outrageous Sex Acts
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me