my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
then he tried to convert me to islam
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Randomize
