I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
