the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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