We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Randomize
