garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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