I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize