If i come over, it means nothing
omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
Your mankini haunted my dreams.