Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
