her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize