Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
