Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
